It’s no secret that the pull for our attention in our families, our careers and the media is overwhelming. I would even venture to say that it could be chaotic. Most of the time, we suffer the results of fatigue, stress, mental breakdown, sickness, disease, marital problems, wayward children and other things that we prefer not to accept. Before we know it, these things become our reality and we now have to face the fact that our lives are out of control. Unfortunately, we get to this point before we recognize we must do something.
I speak to women on different occasions that are on overload. I remember being one of them. I remember doing everything and trying to be everywhere and actually feeling guilty when I couldn’t. I remember feeling like I had control when I really didn’t. I had convinced myself that I had given my life and schedule to God but I still had a tight grip on it. I made decisions that were unhealthy and unbalanced. By the time I had realized this is where I was, everything began to spiral.
One thing I have always taken pleasure in is order. The funny thing is, my life was chaotic and lacking order. I didn’t know how to say “No” and I accepted everything people made me feel guilty for not accepting. When my life began to quickly show results of the mayhem I had warmly embraced, I decided that something was going to change. I didn’t say something had to change, I said something was going to change!
There is power in pulling back, shutting it down and regrouping. There is power in unplugging from media, cell phones and computers and getting your life together. There is power in having family meetings and saying, “I know what I’ve accepted in the past, but today is a new day!” The problem becomes, staying focused and keeping order. This cannot be a one-time activity, but must be on going. You must be sensitive enough to know when your life is starting to shift in the wrong direction. It cannot be ignored.
In order to refocus, there are a lot of things that can be listed, but I will give you a few to start with:
- Take Care of Yourself – Self-care for women is very difficult because of our desire to take care of others first. We tend to feel guilty for getting a pedicure, massage, sitting quietly, and getting ice cream without the children or husband. Snap out of it! You can’t give them the best you if you’re torn down.
- Take Time to Quiet Yourself – There’s so much going on around us to distract us, we must make a demand on ourselves and our minds to sit in quietness and be refreshed.
- Take Time to Listen to Yourself – Don’t ignore what your body is saying. If it’s screaming, “I NEED REST!”, then rest. If it’s saying, “I am sick”, see a doctor and stop pushing it to keep going. If there’s something off and you’re not your normal happy jolly self, make a decision to do something about it and stop ignoring it, especially when it’s been weeks since you’ve smiled. Don’t allow yourself to continue functioning without listening to what your body is saying.
I could go on, but let’s focus on these three and master them. Please realize that these things are not one-time fixers, they are on-going maintenance. Make the decision today that living in chaos will not be your norm, and you will refocus so that you can live your life abundantly!
Kashonna Holland is a Speaker, Life Coach and Writer. With contagious energy, a vibrant smile, and straightforward message, Kashonna passionately and purposefully journeys alongside women from the point of breaking through the process of breakthrough – personally, professionally, and spiritually.
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