I can’t wait for my next!

My 10-year old daughter—who’s presently in the 5th grade—is eager and ready to go to middle school. Being that we’ve been through this process 3 times before, needless to say, our level of excitement does not match hers. All of her eagerness about middle school [her next assignment] became a distraction in her current, 5th grade assignments. Her teacher called me saying that it seemed that Serenity had gotten off focus this quarter and asked what may have shifted. Well, I knew that she had been coming home for about a week or two saying she couldn’t wait to go to middle school and when I asked her what it was she thought she couldn’t wait for, she responded, “I’ll be able to chew gum in class” [insert ‘side eye’ emoji]

 

I immediately understood that she needed some clarity, so like any great mother would, I offered it. “Serenity”, I said, “You cannot get to middle school if you have not successfully completed 5th grade. You must finish well where you are before you can get to the next level.” As I gave her this startling revelation, I begin to internalize it. You see, sometimes we are so eager to get to the next to “chew gum” that we forsake where we are right now. I quickly understood that my next doesn’t determine my success, but it’s how I handle my now.

 

I have become a fan of the process. It’s something that many strongly dislike and wish to abort quickly, but it is designed to shape, mold and prune. It is created to get the worst out of you, so that the best of you can come to surface. It is a time that the mirror becomes an x-ray machine and dealing with the surface is no longer good enough, but there has to be an internal examination.

 

My prayer is that you don’t miss what’s going on in your now in attempts to get to your next. Greatness is not coming; wherever you are is where you will find greatness if you choose to seek after and embrace it!

 

 

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Something has got to change! Heart Confessions From a Woman Who Was Drowning

 

 

There are so many women who, like me–as described in the video–are drowning. Maybe you took a step of faith believing something absolutely amazing was going to happen, but your faith turned into frustration and devastation. You feel defeated, like nothing is worth this much pain, but I challenge you to believe and press past the pain into your breakthrough.

Or maybe you’re just overwhelmed by life; the husband, the children, the job, the bills, the ministry and no one knows you’re drowning because you mask your suffocation with a smile and kindly say “Yes” to the next thing because you don’t want anyone to find out you’re on your last leg of strength and hope.
For some, the validation needed from others is killing you softly. For others, the expectations you’ve put on yourself is self-sabotage. It’s time to shift! Something has got to change and it starts with YOU!  Making tough decisions to step back and constantly assess where you are and what’s happening in your life is imperative.
I constantly have to pull myself out of the dungeon and remind myself that bite size pieces will still get the job done. That’s when I’m reminded to strategize by taking a few minutes away from everyone and everything, writing down what needs to be done and prioritizing that list. I understanding that although everyone may want me, today may not be their day; and I’m okay with that.
Get refocused and realigned and watch your life turn around and begin to work for you, not you for it!


The Heart Chamber (Flyer) - April

Come experience The Heart Chamber on Saturday, April 30th @ 12:45p as we are bringing awareness to sexual assault! We invite you to come hear a phenomenal speaker, bring a sister-friend, come meet other sisters and get your 30-minute cardio in at an amazing facility (@9roundgambrills) all in one day!

Register today by clicking here (limited space available)!

 

 

 


 

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Order your copy of 7 Days to Simply Shift today by clicking here

 

You Have No Power Until You Use It!

Have you ever seen a super hero movie? They all start about the same; an ordinary person discovers extraordinary strength. Now, whether they are ready to exercise those powers and know when to exercise them becomes the challenge. It’s a pretty slow development at first – something happens that brings them to a point of frustration or a feeling of inadequacy, an anger button is pushed and BOOM, a discovery of the super power that will ultimately save the world! I often wonder how many buttons had to be pushed in my own life before I recognized and began to operate in my power.

The power always lied in them (you), it was just a matter of discovery. Then what? Discovery is only part of the process. What will you do with this newly found discovery? I believe there are some people who are reading this that may not even know what I’m talking about when I talk about power, so here are a few examples:

  • You have the power to determine how much you will grow in your life personally, professionally and spiritually
  • You have the power not to allow anyone to continue to take advantage of you in their words and/or actions
  • You have the power to determine what your children will experience in their trainable state
  • You have the power to control YOU! Not anyone else but YOU! No one else can control your actions, your attitude and your reactions/responses, they belong to YOU!

According to dictionary.com, power is the ability to do or act; capability of doing or accomplishing something. The power is yours, all you have to do is use it! If not, it becomes useless and you begin to make excuses and blame other people for what is ultimately your responsibility. Tap into who you are – unapologetically, undeniably and authentically – and watch your life begin to change, drastically!

 

We invite you to join us at our next LIVE event and/or connect through the new book release, 7 Days to Simply Shift

For those of you who have already purchased your copy of the book,

Thank You so much for your support!  Enjoy the SHIFT!

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       7 Days to Simply Shift

 

The Heart Chamber (Flyer) - April

       The Heart Chamber: Keep Not Silent

 

My baby almost died…

There is nothing like pregnancy.  To be able to conceive life in your womb is a miracle in itself; there is a whole person inside of you! To carry, to protect, and to nurture this gift becomes priority.   Eating and getting the proper amount of rest is now a part of your life whether you want it to be or not. As the baby begins to grow, it becomes evident that your life will no longer be the same.

 

This same excitement and process happened with my dream, my baby.  It was an amazing privilege to be able to carry something so precious; a God-given gift.  I understood that not everyone was able to experience this assignment, so I was careful to protect and nurture it as it grew.  

 

As my due date [time of birthing] approached, I started to experience some complications.  Negativity, doubt and fear began to compromise what was originally planned to be a healthy delivery.  I could feel the pain of my uterus contracting, ready to push, but I just could not get past those feelings that seemed to overwhelm me. The coaches, mentors and speakers all seemed muffled as they were telling me to “Push”; they were drowned out by my own thoughts of insecurity telling me that I wasn’t ready and that maybe I should just abort.  

 

My baby almost died; had I given in to the mockery, that was screaming I wasn’t good enough, it would have. Instead, I took a deep breath, made some hard decisions and decided to push.  The crazy thing was, when it was time to push, no one had to be there to tell me; I just knew it was time.  

 

Don’t let your baby die.  Don’t allow your dream to be killed, stolen or destroyed.  You were designed to not just carry the dream, but to deliver and enjoy the fruit of it! This is your God-given destiny and purpose. What will you do about it?

 

Last chance to preorder my new book

Click the image below to get yours!

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It’s Finally Here!!!

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Whew! I cannot contain my excitement! God is soooo good and faithful! For me to see a book with my picture and name on it is an absolutely amazing accomplishment. My journey hasn’t been easy, but I have been and am determined to press through so that others may know that there is hope!

7 Days to Simply Shift: A Daily Guide to Transforming Your Mindset Personally, Professionally and Spiritually, is a book of my personal experiences, testimonies and revelations that I’ve captured into one place for one reason…to shift mindsets and perspectives. So many times we go through things and because we haven’t shifted, we stay there much longer than necessary. Well, “Simply Shift” has been designed as a tool to get you out of that rut and on a journey to breakthrough.

My prayer is that you will not only get this book for yourself, but for a love one, friend and/or coworker. Get it for someone you know who needs a fresh perspective, someone you know who needs breakthrough, someone you know who needs to shift. As you read it, open your heart, your mind and your spirit and use these next 7 Days to Simply Shift!!!

Click here to preorder your copy today! Join us on social media outlets by using #simplyshift for your thoughts and Ahas. Also, be sure to post your reviews on Amazon! Help us get the word out!

As the weeks go by, I’ll be releasing more media and an invitation to the book launch event, so be sure to stay connected!

Thank you so much for being my tribe and hearing my voice. My prayer is that you will always be made the better because of it!

Take the ‘S’ off your chest!

The last topic on my weekly periscope broadcast, The Heart Exchange, was definitely worth writing about. I wanted to share it with those of you who couldn’t join me live or listen to the replay. The topic? You guessed it, “Take the ‘S’ Off of Your Chest!” Many of us deal with the super hero syndrome, where we are overwhelmed by our inability to say “No.” We are running from place to place and sometimes even relationship to relationship out of guilt and our desire to please people who couldn’t care less about our well-being. Our ‘S’ is encouraged by our need to feel wanted and validated. We will run ourselves ragged for someone to say, “She’s awesome!” or “Wow, she can really do that well!” The yearning to have a pat on the back will normally push us to do more even when we don’t necessarily want to. I want to point out something here, I used inclusive language like “we”, “us” and “our” because I am in this pool of people pleasing. Yes, the moment of vulnerability.

Let’s face it together, the likes, follows, repins and friend counts will have you begging for more ideas to keep them coming! You feel invincible, stronger than steel, like you can fly, kinda like…Supergirl! Can I tell you that the suit is only temporary? Even Superman had to go back to being Clark Kent. I believe because he wanted to stay in touch with his mortality. Could it be that our need for help is just as great as our need to help? Maybe because we’ve been told for so long to be strong, that we don’t give ourselves permission to have moments of weakness.

There are 3 things I will leave you to help you take the ‘S’ off your chest:

1. Slow Down: Listen to your body, listen to your life.
2. Say “No”: Everyone and everything doesn’t need you to make it work.
3. See and embrace your value: It is important to remember that you are invaluable where you are, as you are.

Take the ‘S’ off your chest so that your inability can become God’s ability to use you as He sees fit, not as others see fit!

 

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What Have You Done For YOU Lately?

Most times we find that self-care is not self-initiated. Something has to be triggered for us to realize that it’s time to take care of ourselves. We get sick and our bodies shut down, we go through tough situations (separation, divorce, sickness, death of someone close to us, etc.) before we realize that self-care is not optional, it’s necessary. Everyone’s self-care may look different, but understanding who you are and being in tune with your mind, body and spirit can bring harmony and balance to a chaotic life.

 

Last week on Cocoa with Kashonna, we discussed the importance of self-care and some things we can do to be intentional about taking care of our temple! If you missed the webinar, check it out here!

 

 

 

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Pressing Past the Plateau

I love my #totalwoman attitude! My mindset is to live a healthy life personally, spiritually and professionally.  Within the perimeters of my personal living is exercise.  I didn’t realize how many women don’t like that word! LOL! There are days I wake up on time racing out the front door, ready to get my workout on, and then there are days when it takes a little longer than normal to put my feet on the floor.  Once I’m in the gym, I am committed to giving 45mins to an hour of dedicated time to my body.  I don’t have a trainer and I like to think of myself as self-motivated. Herein lies the problem.  When I am lifting weights and it starts to burn or hurt, I put them down.  I figure why put myself through such pain.  Even going through a process of losing weight, I plateaued.  I couldn’t lose anymore weight than I had already lost for about 2 weeks.  I quickly realized I had to do something different. I had to switch it up!  So I spoke with someone who had a little more experience in the weight room.  They told me that when I started to feel the pain and burn, it was an indication that my muscles were being stretched and getting the workout they need to become stronger.  Well, why didn’t someone say that at the beginning?!! ☺

 

 

As we are pushing, pursuing our hopes, dreams and calling it gets painful, tiring and starts to burn, so we decide to stop.  Sometimes we say, “Maybe it’s really not for me” or “Maybe it’s just not my time” when the truth is, you have to keep pressing to see the result.  I’ve read about so many that have pushed and pressed, then quit only to find that they were “3 feet from gold” (which is an amazing book by the way).

 

 

What I love about working out is seeing the results.  No, they don’t happen overnight, but I do know that I am stronger and my endurance is longer because of it.  You may not be where you want to be in life right now, but know that if you are consistent, you become stronger and your endurance becomes longer.  Maybe like me, you feel like you’ve plateaued.  If that’s the case, it’s time to do something different.  You may need a coach (hint, hint), supplements or a different regimen.  Whatever it is, recognize that something has to change and it starts with you!  Don’t settle for less, when greater is only arms length away!

 

 

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Click here to register TODAY for the SK Professional Development Series!

How to Refocus in Chaos

It’s no secret that the pull for our attention in our families, our careers and the media is overwhelming. I would even venture to say that it could be chaotic. Most of the time, we suffer the results of fatigue, stress, mental breakdown, sickness, disease, marital problems, wayward children and other things that we prefer not to accept. Before we know it, these things become our reality and we now have to face the fact that our lives are out of control. Unfortunately, we get to this point before we recognize we must do something.

 

I speak to women on different occasions that are on overload. I remember being one of them. I remember doing everything and trying to be everywhere and actually feeling guilty when I couldn’t. I remember feeling like I had control when I really didn’t. I had convinced myself that I had given my life and schedule to God but I still had a tight grip on it. I made decisions that were unhealthy and unbalanced. By the time I had realized this is where I was, everything began to spiral.

 

One thing I have always taken pleasure in is order. The funny thing is, my life was chaotic and lacking order. I didn’t know how to say “No” and I accepted everything people made me feel guilty for not accepting. When my life began to quickly show results of the mayhem I had warmly embraced, I decided that something was going to change. I didn’t say something had to change, I said something was going to change!

 

There is power in pulling back, shutting it down and regrouping. There is power in unplugging from media, cell phones and computers and getting your life together. There is power in having family meetings and saying, “I know what I’ve accepted in the past, but today is a new day!” The problem becomes, staying focused and keeping order. This cannot be a one-time activity, but must be on going. You must be sensitive enough to know when your life is starting to shift in the wrong direction. It cannot be ignored.

 

In order to refocus, there are a lot of things that can be listed, but I will give you a few to start with:

 

  1. Take Care of Yourself – Self-care for women is very difficult because of our desire to take care of others first. We tend to feel guilty for getting a pedicure, massage, sitting quietly, and getting ice cream without the children or husband. Snap out of it! You can’t give them the best you if you’re torn down.
  2. Take Time to Quiet Yourself – There’s so much going on around us to distract us, we must make a demand on ourselves and our minds to sit in quietness and be refreshed.
  3. Take Time to Listen to Yourself – Don’t ignore what your body is saying. If it’s screaming, “I NEED REST!”, then rest. If it’s saying, “I am sick”, see a doctor and stop pushing it to keep going. If there’s something off and you’re not your normal happy jolly self, make a decision to do something about it and stop ignoring it, especially when it’s been weeks since you’ve smiled. Don’t allow yourself to continue functioning without listening to what your body is saying.

 

I could go on, but let’s focus on these three and master them. Please realize that these things are not one-time fixers, they are on-going maintenance. Make the decision today that living in chaos will not be your norm, and you will refocus so that you can live your life abundantly!

 

 

Kashonna Holland is a Speaker, Life Coach and Writer. With contagious energy, a vibrant smile, and straightforward message, Kashonna passionately and purposefully journeys alongside women from the point of breaking through the process of breakthrough – personally, professionally, and spiritually.

 

Click here to schedule your Fresh Perspective Life Coaching session with SK!

 

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The Importance of Self-Care

I am a recovering addict of busyness.  The high of running around like a chicken with my head cut off just empowered me…or so I thought.  Everyday is a struggle for many women to sit and think in silence.  Normally, if our homes are quiet, it’s because we think the children are somewhere doing something they are not supposed to be doing.  We become validated by our busyness and qualified to be the mother of all mothers and the woman who has it all.  Can I challenge that today?  Can I tell you that busyness does not validate who you are, but rather affirms your need to feel needed.  I believe the word for that is codependent.

 

We live in a society that makes millions of dollars by stimulating our brains constantly.  We even find ourselves passing down this disease of busyness by keeping our children busy so that they can stay out of trouble.  Now, let me say this, although I am a fan of extra curricular activities, as my child is in one, I am also a fan of moderation and keeping things in perspective. Long gone are the days of running from one event to another, while feeding my child chicken nuggets on the run – although in some cases this must be acceptable!  I am validated and affirmed by not only managing my time, but most of all, by managing me.

 

While caring for family and anyone who has value in your life is important, maintaining care for yourself is even more so.  I want to encourage all women who are mothers, wives, single, entrepreneurs, women in business, and stay at home moms alike to find time for you.  What we often don’t realize is when this need [self-care] is dismissed as being “selfish”, our families, friends and love ones are the ones who suffer.  Here are a few things you can do to help take care of YOU:

 

  1. Nap – They are not just for kids.
  2. Sit in silence – Thinking about nothing can be refreshing.
  3. Turn off your cell phone – (Gasp!) Yes, you can actually turn it off and on!
  4. Say “No” – This two letter word can be the most powerful word you ever learn to speak.
  5. Breathe deeply – Not the one you do when people have gotten on your last nerve, but the one that brings solace.

 

As you read these 5 things, it’s important to note that they are all free!  They all require one thing, the effort of the woman reading this blog.  Take time for you, the people who are around you will appreciate you for it.

 

 

 

 

Kashonna Holland is a Speaker, Life Coach and Writer. With contagious energy, a vibrant smile, and straightforward message, Kashonna passionately and purposefully journeys alongside women from the point of breaking through the process of breakthrough – personally, professionally, and spiritually.

 

Click here to schedule your Fresh Perspective Life Coaching session with SK!

 

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